Friday, December 30, 2005

I'm here, sorta.

Okay, first off, I am sorry I haven't been blogging. There has been a ton of stuff (life, I guess) going on here, and I have also been being lazy, big time. Trying to sleep, but seems I sleep best from 5 to 11 in the morning lately. While not sleeping, I have been thinking, worrying, planning, you know, the usual. But I haven't been blogging.

In approximately the last 2 weeks, I have lost a job I really cared about, had to put my cat down, deal with/enjoy/get through Christmas, deal intensely with 2 pissy tweenagers, and I have also been with my mom (whose eyesight has really taken a turn for the worse), when I could. I have been feeling very conflicted about blogging about (or frankly, even talking about) the things that are happening right now.

Here's a serious question for you: When things are not going smoothly in your life, how do you blog about them without seeming whiny, self-absorbed, or like you are "using the blog as a confessional", as I have read it described?

I hinted about this in the ode to Max post. That I feel weird posting my life on the blog. Why is this wierder for me than talking to Dy or Patty on the phone? See, I am even timid about posting their names on the blog, even though they may well be the only two people who check the darned thing.

Not only that, but I see more and more, that I am not a strong writer, and especially not very good at catching typos. I am too perfectionistic for my own good, I guess, but I feel like the first thing I should do is to go back to previous posts and tidy up each one. Dy says you get better with time. I will listen to her.

So that's what's been going on in my brain, I will try to post on a more regular basis. I am working on one about all the great books we got/gave for Christmas.

Thanks for listening/reading.


Amy said...

I check your blog too! And frankly, I get a bit whiny on the blog. It's also part of the reason I laid off of blogging for a while. Life was just really hard for a big part of the past twelve months, and I didn't have much good to say. Not that I minded sharing the not so pleasant stuff, but I felt fake when I tried to be more upbeat. I couldn't really manage a balance.

But, if getting it out there would have helped, I would have done it. But it absolutely did not help one single bit - my circumstances were what they were and writing wasn't going to change them or make me feel better about them.

It's hard, but I hope you'll continue blogging. I know you're going through a rough time, but many of us can relate to much of what you're talking about.

And seriously, how can someone who calls herself Needleroozer not be interesting?

Dy said...

Well, you share with us because you know we care. :-) That's a big part of it. Let your blog become what you want it to be. If you want or need a confessional blog, go for it. If you want to chronicle your journey through mothering your two Littles, have at it. If you want to analyze the literature or curricula you're using, WOOHOO (um, sorry, bit of a curriculum junkie, here...) Anyway, I digress. I, for instance, am an unabashed navel-gazer, and proud of it, too. There's some neat stuff in there, ya know! Don't let the mindset or preferences of others navigate your course - this is your front porch. Decorate it how you wish, and those of us who enjoy it (and you) will come visit. Voila! (Sounds so stinkin' simple, doesn't it? *giggle*)

Anyhow, I'm glad you blogged. Glad you are alive and well. Have missed our chats, but girl, you've gotta switch to Verizon so we can talk for no charge. ;-) (Kidding, I'm actually going to pitch for getting the unlimited calling thing on our land line *grin*).

Kiss those babies!

Needleroozer said...

Yes, Amy, that is a big part of it- managing the balance.
Thanks for your vote of confidence.
Dy, I almost called you today- I really enjoy talking to you! I have some questions for you on how to do various blog things. It is hard to figure out all these codes and stuff.
Thanks for urging me on, you two!

Donna Boucher said...

I am sorry your circumstances have been so difficult lately.

When I am protecting myself, someone in my famiy by not blogging about personal things...
I post something that encourages me...a poem or a scripture or a picture... or even a recipe :o)
And I ask for prayer.

Staying positive on the blog...helps me look for the positive in life.